Tag Archives: Comedy

A Body Like an Avatar Alien, part 2

Here it is!!! – my new Avatar body – not bad eh!

Now before you elaborate on the finer differences between me and the Navi Babe in part 1, realise we are on another planet. Here on Pandora there is no way you would learn about food in terms of slimming; that is such an unheard of idea!

Here on Pandora your body is simply a result of an attitude of gratitude for what little un-poisonous food there is around. Food does not come neatly processed and stacked on supermarket shelves. You have to hunt and gather.

You skip through the forest collecting ripe treats here and there. It’s tempting to graze but you learn that food is actually precious. The protocol is gathering and hunting for the whole family – none of this individual indulgence stuff. You will get what you need and no more – no private pigging out! Anorexia? Bulimia? Obesity? – such diseases of ‘civilisation’ do not occur here.  Meanwhile, your morning hunt has taken all morning; what happened to breakfast?

Panic. Everyone on Earth insisted on eating breakfast. Will you die if you skip it? There’s plenty of pure water, and the Avatar Tea in your hunting pouch sports a little milk; just enough protein to keep you going. By midday you experience a new feeling – hunger!!! You realise what you used to call hunger was just your stomach rumbling around in digestion mode. Real hunger feels different – primal and healthy. It only occurs in waves every four to six daylight hours. The Navi explain that they still observe the ancient ways; the ancestors ate according to the sparse cycle of hunger –  if there was food to go around.

So much for all the slimming tips and recipes you had secretly hoped to pick up during your training! Evidently the apex of your induction has just been reached. You aimed, you fired and you’re on target. You now have the knowledge you need to get a body like an Avatar Alien:  be active & eat healthy food in small amounts when you’re genuinely hungry, period. Back to Earth … Galump!

Oh well, there are zillions of books on what foods are healthy, whole plant foods topping the list, so ignorance won’t be a problem.  Gratitude, healthy choices and sharing look like being the big lessons; not taking more than we need is easier said than done. As mother used to say “Give thanks”, “Eat your greens” and “Think of all the starving children.” Indeed.

All your extra indulgences now go into the food bank trolley at the supermarket – lots of struggling families now, what with the recession and all … You tune into the old body, or the young body, whatever you happen to be blessed with, and find you’re gradually turning a rather triumphant shade of blue …

🙂 Thank you, readers, in anticipation!

Supporting each other to reach ‘the goal’, I think we’re going to need a good number of comments below. What tips do you have on taking only enough of the foods that keep you healthy and fit?


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Filed under Health Viewpoint, What's Behind the Song

Free Food

Free Food ImageThanks for your feedback on Have a Body Like an Avatar Alien … Evidently all the food on planet Pandora is Plant-Based and free! That got me thinking … Life is for living. Love is for giving, stirring us into acts of humanity, like donating food to the poor and eating less so others can have more. This magnanimous gesture will help you attain your Avatar body faster too! The Na’vi want me to write a ‘Free Food’ song  …

Free Food
When we were kids, food was free all day
Didn’t know mama and daddy had to pay
We just filled our plates and ate away

Free food, let it be, dude, free food!
Free food, let it be, dude, free food!
Free food, let it be. Hey Jude!
May you and all have free food!

Now its
Meat free, egg free, dairy free out there
Gluten free and sugar free everywhere
We’re sussed. It surely must be we can share

Free food, let it be, dude, free food …
For Africa, for Timor and Bengal
For war zones & for poor homes. Why do we stall?
We’ve grown enough for years to feed them all

So …
Free food, let it be, dude, free food!
Free food, let it be, dude, free food!
Free food, let it be. Hey Jude!
May you and all have free food!

Free Food – download the lyrics

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Filed under Download Song Lyics, Health Viewpoint, The Music of Life, What's Behind the Song

Woody Allen Wishes

It’s that time of the year when we all start clowning around in celebratory mood, sending each other cards  & wishes, and stocking up the pantry with all sorts of goodies (and badies!). Bars and restaurants boom with end-of-year work functions, and life just speeds up …  Perhaps we’ll reach a velocity where Woody’s wishes will come true?   Thanks Louise for emailing me this with your smiles for the silly-season.  I pass them on to all my blog-reading friends – look forward to seeing you all in the ultimate BOOM – the big bang!

Image with Text

Image with quote

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Filed under What's Behind the Song